When I left home for boarding school. I not only left my family, but I also left my house, my dog, most of my belongings, and my beloved friends. I missed and still miss them so much, every single day. However, being away and maintaining the friendship is difficult. The long distance calls and Skype conversations become less and less frequent, as both your lives become increasingly busier. After all, we are teenagers; there are so many things we have to deal with. To list a few: coming of age, adolescence, puberty, relationships. This fall out is unwanted but sometimes unavoidable. However, there are ways for you to adapt to being away from friends back home.
Sometimes, you simply just cannot communicate with them as much as you used to. Personally, I used to skype my best friend every day after school. Our skype conversations would last for hours. We were basically together 24/7, either physically or in cyber space. Once I left for boarding school, we became less communicative. At one point, weeks would pass without us messaging a word to each other. With the 15 hour time difference and both of us modifying to high school, our friendship was put on the side. As terrible as the circumstances are, maybe it is time for your to accept that you cannot be with him or her all the time any longer. Physically you are miles away from them, it is literally impossible for you to continue to see each other on a daily basis. Does this mean that you guys aren’t friends anymore? Definitely not! Best friends “forever” right? Make a plan with them to call every week, or every other day depending on how active each of you are. Things won’t be the same, but that doesn’t mean your friendship will change.
Being away, also means that your friends and you will develop new and strong friendships with others. I know that when I left, my friend became very close with another girl at my old school. They constantly shared photos of themselves, watched movies together, and worked together for school projects… Things that I used to do with her. I felt hurt because I believed that I was replaced by some random stranger that simply walked into her life. Then that night, I checked my facebook and saw photos that I posted of my new class mates and I before attending a dance. Finally, I realized that as she moves on with her life, I am moving on with mine. We are growing up, meeting new people, hence creating new relationships. It is inevitable. Therefore, accept that your friend might physically replace you with somebody else. Always remember that in your hearts, there will be a permanent space for each other.
Leaving home also means that your usual way of communication might have to go down the drain. For example, now that I live in the states, my Chinese SIM card is basically useless. I can no longer text or call my friends back home as easily, and if I do, it will cost me a fortune (sorry, but I’m not rolling in money). Open yourselves to new apps or ways of communication that you didn’t use to utilize! For example, WeChat or WhatsApp. On WeChat, you can leave your friend a free voice message. You can also see photos that they share on your newsfeed (kind of like facebook). On WhatsApp, you can basically text your friend for free. It doesn’t matter where they or you are in the world, as long as you pay $0.99 you will have a communication device which allows you to share snippets of your life all over the world! That’s amazing! I highly recommend both these apps, but keep in mind that there is an abundant amount of ways to contact your friends back home.
Life at boarding school can get chaotic, but through the chaos always keep in mind your life back home. It still exists and will always be there. So acknowledge it, and take control in maintaining those wonderful friendships! They really do last forever, I promise :)